Five Things Tweens Should Know About Social Media

Five Things Tweens Should Know About Social Media


Tweens and Social Media

As a mom of a tween girl I’m constantly worried about her safety online. My eleven year old has bugged me for over a year to get a Facebook account but we still say no. Our rule is when she’s thirteen she can have her own Facebook.

While we’ve avoided Facebook she has still managed to get onto social media. There’s an app called Musically, people make short music videos that are public and can be commented on. I love that she’s being creative and making videos but some of the comments are mean. My daughter has a short pixie haircut, like her mom. She’s recently gotten some mean comments about whether she is a boy or a girl. It doesn’t seem like much, but to a tween girl it means the world. She was down and felt bad about herself for a week before I figured out why. We have since sat down and had a conversation about social media and what to look out for. Since social media is such a worry for so many parents, I’ve made a list of the top five things I want my daughter to know about social media.

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Must know about social media.

  • Once you post something on social media it’s there for good. You might try to delete it but sometimes it sticks around.

  • The images you post may come back to haunt you. My rule of thumb is for her to not post anything she would want her dad and I to see or her future kids.

  • There are people on social media that do not have your best interest in mind. Be careful of who you friend and talk to. People may not always be who they portray themselves to be.

  • Do not post personal information such as where you live, full name, date of birth, what school you go to…..

  • Do not take peoples comments personally. People will say hurtful things in life, not just on social media. Do not pay attention. You are wonderful just the way you are.

Another thing we do is to check our daughters phone. Now I know this is a touchy subject, but for our family we feel we have the right to check her phone when needed until she is old enough to pay for her own phone bill. We are not sneaky about it, she knows that we can and will check it. My hope with checking her phone is that if there is something important going on that I need to know about I will find out. Tweens are not adults yet and don’t always know what is dangerous or important. Like I said, I know privacy is a touchy subject. This is what works for my family.

It’s a constant battle when it comes to kids and social media. My goal is to teach and instill these things in my eleven year old before she becomes a teen. I want her to be able to make decisions about social media before she gets into the Facebook world.

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What social media tips do you have when it comes to tweens?

Written by: Devon Bernthal


  1. Georgiana | 19th Apr 17

    Such good info! As a mom of two tweens, I can testify to how much of a battle it already is. So different from when our oldest was that age.

  2. Derika | 20th Apr 17

    Tweens are smart and they grew up in the age of technology. Chances are, they are pretty aware of the things you’ve mentioned. My advice is keeping an open dialogue, so they do not try to go out of their way to hide things from you and feel more comfortable talking to you about things.
    There are so many interactive ways to teach them things that don’t seem boring or nagging. Especially documentaries or tv shows highlighting internet safety in touching and comedic ways. Such as catfish, a show about people who fall in love online but have never met. The people, most of the time, are vastly different than they have claimed to be.

  3. Kenya | 21st Apr 17

    This is such a good post! I have a TEEN daughter whose 13 and will be 14 in about a month! I still continue the rule of “NO SOCIAL MEDIA” especially with the world we live in today!People are crazy and even if you don’t post where you live they will still somehow find a way to figure out! I’m just not ready ! And I know eventually I’m just going to have to be but ….not yet

  4. Akyn | 21st Apr 17

    True. It’s better to be safe than sorry. Thanks for sharing♥

  5. Bailey Bowuamn | 22nd Apr 17

    The world of teenagers today! Who knew these challenges we’d be facing as a mom, to keep our babies safe in a very digital time and era. I think these tips will resonate today and in 10 years when my littles have gone social! :O

  6. Viktoria | 22nd Apr 17

    Great advice. I feel like the only “safe” social media platform is Instagram maybe? I know that the kids loves snapchat but I feel like the articles in the “discover” mode is not for children at all

  7. Adrienne barket | 22nd Apr 17

    My daughter is eleven also and loves musically. I actually have duplicate app on my phone so I see it all. It’s Skype that worries me though I also see it all..just teach her daily not to answer anyone other than her cousi. They play barbies on skype.

  8. Katherine | 22nd Apr 17

    It must be so tough to grow up in the world of social media. I’m glad I’m old enough we only had to deal with whispering! I will definitely be having these conversations with my daughter!

  9. Stephanie | vimandvigor | 22nd Apr 17

    cyber bullying is no joke and its great that you are conscious of your daughters presence online! Glad it wasn’t around when I was a teen. growing up is hard enough! haha

  10. Jasmine Hewitt | 23rd Apr 17

    these are excellent points! The fears of the internet haven’t changed much since it was introduced

  11. Chelsea | 25th Apr 17

    Great article!

  12. Amy | 25th Apr 17

    These tips are good for all of us to remember. I like your Facebook policy and I think if everyone understands the rules of the phone, then I then I don’t think phone checks are a bad thing. It will be interesring to see what is out there when my little guys are tweens.

  13. Ashley | Spit Up and Sit Ups | 25th Apr 17

    I’m so sorry that happened to your beautiful daughter. I am so worried about bullying as social media is now taking a HUGE part in it. You’re raising strong confident girls with great guidelines. My older sister was very hard on my teenage niece (she’s 21 now) and checked her phone and email but they were open about those things like you are. I think it’s helpful and builds a trusting relationship.

  14. Lori | Choosing Wisdom | 29th May 17

    Great guidelines for social media! We hadn’t the rule of no FB account until they were 18. It was hard at times but once they reached the magical age 2/2 didn’t even want an account. The draw of their peers wasn’t as relevant as it was when they were younger.

  15. Amanda | 9th Jun 17

    I totally agree! My daughter is 10 and bugs about facebook and others. We say no way. It’s scary on the internet for kids! These are great guidelines. We’ve told her similar things. She has to understand, just because some friends have it, does not mean we will. Thanks for the post!!

  16. Rachel Catherine | 10th Aug 17

    These are great tips! Especially the reminder about if it’s on there it stays there forever.

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